Saturday, January 2, 2016

New Year's Resolution Starter Kit

Now that the New Year celebrations are over and done, it's time to get serious about those resolutions. Maybe you've been thinking, "I'm not going to make any resolutions this year, nobody ever keeps them anyway!" But, that's just negative thinking. There's always room for improvement.



In case you need a little help figuring out just what to change about the way you live your life, here are a few suggestions for resolutions you might want to consider.  I've heard that if you make your resolutions very specific, you will be more likely to keep them.  Also, you need to set realistic goals. So I'm helping you out here by being as realistic and specific as possible.

New Year's Resolutions


1.  In the new year I will lose weight and eat healthy by doing the following: (check all that apply)
  • Eat 5 servings of fruits and vegetables every day ~ a banana at breakfast, an apple mid-day, carrot sticks at lunch and half a pack of starburst in the afternoon.  (starburst = 2 servings)
  • Cut out all bad carbs and sugar from my diet ~ except for bread, potatoes, pasta and left-over Christmas cookies
  • Drink 6 to 8 glasses of water every day ~ coffee and diet coke count as water don't they?
  • Have half a grapefruit for breakfast and a salad for lunch ~ and a family size bag of Doritos at 4:00pm.
  • Cut out all "white" foods ~ Stop being so racist against "white" foods
   
2.  In the new year I will get regular exercise by doing the following: (check all that apply)
  • Hit the gym before work ~ only on the mornings when the hot trainer is working
  • Buy all new gym clothes ~ wear them for 2 weeks, then give up on going to the gym
  • Go to water aerobics ~ realize I'm the youngest person there, quit going to water aerobics
  • Shop around for the best fitness package ~ that includes a hot tub, sauna and heated towels
  • Buy top-of-the-line exercise equipment ~ hang my gym clothes on it
   
3.  In the new year I will manage my finances by doing all of the following: (check all that apply)
  • Creating a budget and sticking to it ~ until I blow the entire eating out budget on trips to Starbucks
  • Balance my checkbook monthly ~ until I realize nobody writes checks anymore.
  • Put 10% of every paycheck into a savings account ~ until my car breaks down and needs expensive repairs
  • Cut up all my credit cards ~ I have the account numbers memorized anyway
  • Pay bills on time ~ if there's any money left after my many trips to Starbucks, my expensive car repair and that deluxe mani/pedi package I had to get (hey, I was stressed)
   
4.  In the new year I will get organized by doing the following:  (check all that apply)
  • Clean my house room by room ~ by carrying all the clutter into the next room
  • Clean out the garage ~ pull everything out into the driveway, realize it's almost dark, put everything back into the garage
  • Purge all the clothes that no longer fit me ~ get sentimental about jackets with shoulder pads and decide to keep them in case I lose weight and they come back in style
  • File all documents alphabetically ~ Put everything in the Miscellaneous file 
  • Keep a calendar on the pantry door with a different color ink for each family member ~ until I lose the colored pens and my kids never tell me until the last minute that they need to bring 6 dozen home baked cookies to the school the next morning, oh, and they have to build the Alamo out of popsicle sticks 
Okay - so now you've got some ideas for the new year.  Lots to think about.  
Happy New Year!

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